Prairie

by Jennifer Hedstrom

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1.
02:50
Blood moon night Mysteries growing from light Cheeks so flush at the touch of Shadows in the sky Cool autumn breeze Along the lake and through the trees Cheeks so flush at the touch of Fingers on red leaves Meet me in the night Meet me in the moon Meet me in the wind Meet me again Meet me in my lips Meet me in my arms Meet me in my skin Meet me again, again
2.
03:40
I've been hearing 'bout what you've done You've replaced me with another one And though you've known her just a couple months I hear you're sayin' forever soon And, yeah, I think it's kinda weird I mean, we were together for so many years Seems strange to go straight from drying tears To a wedding Pre-chorus My friends and family have been checking in To see if I'm doin' alright And I answer laughing that I'm goddamn happy To be who I am tonight Chorus 'Cause I'm not her No I'm the one that got away I'm not her I'm not the one who has to stay and I'm feelin' free 'Cause you ain't got a hold on me no more No no no no no no You must have swept her off her feet Yeah, I recall, you did the same to me So I'm takin' bets on how long til she sees That she's made a big mistake 'Cause I can't believe that you have changed Enough to make the vows that you'll exchange That shit don't happen in just a couple days But, hey, I could be wrong Pre-Chorus/Chorus It's easy to feel angry When I think of all the time I'd given you After the way you'd treat me How I'd forgive and we would start anew While year by year kept passing and there was no more laughing Just screams and tears thrown 'cross the living room and since we talked of wedding The horror of imagining What my life could have been is making me glad that... Chorus
3.
02:55
Feel like I spend all of my time tryin' to find a place in my mind where I can be peaceful Been ripping, digging, tugging, into the crimson inside of me searching for light I'm searching for light I'm told there's a light in all of us I've been told there's a god or spirit or energy in all of us I've been told so many things Feel like I spend all of my time tryin' to find a place in the world where I can be peaceful Been screaming, growling, crying, sobbing, shouting, "Shut the fuck up!" I'm searching for quiet I know there's a quiet in all of us While we're told to shop, to watch, to Tweet, there's a place in all of us But we're told too many things Is that you? Is that you, honey? Can you hear me now? Hello? Hello? Hello? Can you hear me? Feel like I spend all of my time trying to find a place in my mind where I can be peaceful, peaceful, peaceful, peaceful...
4.
03:33
Oh my god! Your smile...is intoxicating Almost as much as your fingers on my skin Though I wouldn't really know We don't touch all that often Which is fine, I don't really mind Well, I do but I don't What I mean is... I'm just happy to be with you And your smile is enough on its own And your eyes. Holy crap! I mean, we have these moments Where the conversation stops And I see your gears turning and feel like I'm learning you Feel like I'm seeing YOU And I see you in this whole new light And my heart starts to pound God, I love your mind and Also your eyes You're so goddamn beautiful I need to stare at the sun for comfort And every time I see you I'm so excited I could live on the adrenaline of just knowing you You see, over there, the sky meets the ocean They appear to be touching, can we say that they are? And the sky makes the ocean blue Or, is it the ocean makes the sky? Oh shit, I don't really remember But either way they share their color We could be a horizon If you wanted to Oh god, I'm being so impatient I'm sorry, I really try not to be It's just that I have this big imagination and Sometimes you're there But I try not to put too much stock in my fantasies So that I can enjoy your reality But, sometimes I just wonder Sometimes I just want to Some time to just reach out and Grab your hand
5.
02:59
I love to stand Next to flowers taller than me Reaching up their petals open to the sun I wanna grow wild like them Wild and free I love to walk Where the grass grows abundantly Crashing into each other as they rise I wanna grow close like them And be prairie I tried to love ‘Til the flame came flashing through me And here where my roots dig deep in the ground The ash will settle And I’ll start clean A new prairie
6.
03:47
We all die we all die we all die Everyday We walk in loss Loss of love, loss of self, loss of family Loss of work, loss of home, we are always losing Everyday Abandon Hope You'll be happy You cannot worry if you have nothing to lose But then you also cannot live You cannot worry if you know in your heart You will lose you will lose you will lose you will... And you're alive you're alive you're alive You win, you lose You live, you die This is fine... We all lie we all lie we all lie Everyday We wear our masks Pretend to be a saint, pretend to be a queen, pretend to be happy Pretend to be a saint, pretend to be a queen, pretend to be shiny Everyday They hang these posters on the wall like, “Determination” They tell us, “God will favor all” Favor our hopes, favor our nation They tell us, “Smile and you'll be happy!” They tell us, “You'll find joy when you finally marry” They tell us, “Stay in line!” and “Have faith. Good things will come to those who wait.” And we all die we all die we all die But you're alive you're alive you're alive Life is great But do not hope for more Do not wait For the day When there is not a chore A day when there is not a war A day when you no longer cry A day when you don't say goodbye A day when you no longer remember his name Do not wait for something better something better something... Cause we all die we all die we all die... And you're alive you're alive you're alive... I'm alive/You're alive/We're alive
7.
Correct me if I'm wrong But you still think about me Correct me if I'm wrong But you love me still After all that I have done I find it hard to believe So tell me if I'm right And correct me if I'm wrong All you were was tenderness And I stayed a stone A constant winter When all you breathed was warmth But despite my bad behavior I'm not getting what I deserve You stayed faithful But correct me if I'm wrong I still think of you too And sometimes I love you, sometimes But that isn't enough For a man who's so good and kind You need somebody who Would be sure to love you All of the time, all of the time Give up on me so I can give up on you
8.
04:39
Love love love I've been here before Love love love I've been through this door So forgive me, dear If I pause in my fear I loved him and gave him everything I loved him and gave him all of me I loved him Even the ugly Forgive me, Lord for I have sinned I gave him all the blame because of my shame Love love love I've been here before Love love love I've been through this door So forgive me, dear If I pause In my fear I loved him and gave him everything I loved him and gave him all of me I loved him Even the ugly I loved him and gave him everything I loved him til there was no more of me I loved him And then came the ugly
9.
Moving through trees I remember you We moved Sometimes silent, sometimes sharing dreams Sometimes touching, sometimes each at our own pace Moving through trees I remember you We moved Steaming. Seperating on the path. You far ahead. And me… Trying to the enjoy the smell of the woods anyway Moving through trees I remember you
10.
I can be anyone I can be anyone by myself Not just someone for someone else I can go anywhere I can go anywhere by myself Not just follow someone else There's something here that needs to change In my soul Mama told me, "Child," Mama told me, "better get married" Mama told me, "Child," Mama told me, "start up your family. it's time to live for someone else." Daddy told me, "Child," Daddy told me, "never get married" Daddy told me, "Child," Daddy said, "your friends are your family. It's time to live for yourself." There's something here that needs to change In my soul Even in good love there's a trade-off It's time to learn to love myself Even in your love there's a trade-off Even in my love there's a trade-off It's time to learn to love ourselves There's something here that needs to change There's something here I need to change On my own

credits

released January 17, 2018

All songs written and performed by Jennifer Hedstrom.
Drums by James McKenzie.

Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Steve Gotcher at Audio for the Arts.
(Madison, WI)

Photography by Maureen Janson Heintz.
Makeup by Somali Wilson.
Album Layout by Thomas Fulfer.

Thank You:
Mom and Dad. Nick Ledesma. James McKenzie. Somali Wilson. Jake Penner. Yoo Soo Kim. Emily Worzalla. To friends, family, and fans.

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Jennifer Hedstrom Madison, Wisconsin

Combining classical training with calculated lyricism, Jennifer Hedstrom is a dynamic performer whose songs extend the full range of darkness to light. Her recordings and dramatic live performances have earned her comparisons to artists such as Regina Spektor, Joni Mitchell, Sara Bareilles, and Amanda Palmer. Raised in the Chicago suburbs, Jennifer has been based out of Madison, WI since 2010. ... more

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